Time

What is it about time that makes it seem as slippery as a wet floor or as slow as a horrible traffic jam? There are days that make me feel as though they are never ending and then the amazing ones that fly by so quickly that I feel it unfair.  I rarely look at the clock and feel as though I am cheated of the minutes that rolled on without my noticing. 

My daughter gets upset every night that we didn't get nearly enough time together. I know she's right and that it's incredibly unfair that she feel so cheated. I don't believe she would be happy with 20 minutes extra or 2 hours extra but I know she misses me. I do try to get to work early so that I can get home early but each morning her requests for cuddling are answered with an immediate yes and then the next minute I realize....TIME has slipped by on me again. Did I value those minutes, yes, were they worth it, definitely! Now I must rush run and hurry my child out the door. It's a catch-22, if I would have denied her the cuddle time to get home early I would be worried something would happen to me or her. The age of the Twin Towers bombing is still very present in my thinking. If I were late to work maybe there was a reason greater than I needed to know at the time. The other thorn is when I rush her out and get to work early and plan to leave early (sometimes work puts the kibsoh on that) and I get stuck, or I race out and find myself on a "disabled" train, stuck in traffic on a bus etc.

Making the most of my time is not something I am entirely good at and I do plan to improve, or at least try to improve.

Today for instance, no matter what I am leaving at 4:30. I am going home to play with my child and then get her off to cheer practice. I will enjoy the heck out of those moments and try very very hard to think of something fun for us to do together on Saturday. I feel the need to make something special of this Saturday. I am sure she would be content if we played Barbies and popped corn for a movie in my bed. Hell maybe that is what I will do...make the most of your time. 

I have a reminder in my life now that whispers to me to CELEBRATE it all, even the little moments. I am Alanna, I promise you I'm trying. My little snow angel reminds me of these precious little moments in time that can not wait till dishes are done or "later". The time is now to embrace all the time you get.